1.  It’s not “I-75.”  It’s the CHRYSLER FREEWAY if you’re motorvatin’ between Downtown Detroit and Pontiac, or the FISHER FREEWAY from Downtown Detroit on Downriver.

2.  It’s not “I-94″ that goes East to Port Huron and West to Chicago.  It’s the EDSEL FORD FREEWAY.

3.  It’s not “I-96 ” that comes out of Downtown and heads for Brighton, Lansing and points West, It’s the JEFFRIES (alternately known as the ROSA PARKS for the 3 miles between Ford Rd. and the Fisher Freeway, more recently).

4.  It’s not “I-696″ running parallel to 11 Mile Road between I-275 and the Edsel Ford,  It’s the WALTER P. REUTHER FREEWAY.

5.  It’s not “M-10.” It’s the JOHN C. LODGE.

6.  It’s not “M-8.” It’s the DAVISON.

7.  It’s not “M-39.” It’s the SOUTHFIELD FREEWAY.

…and don’t let anyone hear you referring to TELEGRAPH ROAD as US-24, or they’ll know you’re a tourist and try to scare you with tales of  “Le Nain Rouge.”