Illuminated Metro Santa Emerges for the Season
One of the great things about driving around all day is finding the free things that people leave at the curb. People throw the most amazing stuff out.
For instance, our glowy Santa was found discarded- orphaned, even- head down in a dumpster, actually- but he’s been brightening our holidays here at Metro for the last three years.
Saved from the landfill and shining on as a proud yard-high beacon of redemption.
Metro Delivery Trying to Make Vehicles Talk to Each Other
The University of Michigan Transportation research institute had a big soiree this Morning to launch the largest study ever done on Smart Vehicle Technology- and Metro Delivery was there, as a volunteer participant in the study.
Metro delivery vehicles- and soon several thousand other vehicles belonging to local individuals and businesses- are being equipped with special UM-designed tracking devices that communicate with traffic signals, landmarks, and other vehicles, to gather data.
U.S. Department of Transportation Secretary Ray LaHood was on hand to express the Federal Government’s support for the study, which everyone hopes will result in drastically reduced accidents and enhanced fuel efficiencies.
Imagine traffic lights that turn green because you’re coming towards them, or a warning from your dashboard when collision is imminent. Imagine your car knowing when there’s been an accident 500 yards ahead on a dark wet highway, and you can immediately begin to grasp the implications for public safety. Imagine a car that can listen to the other vehicles on the road and take their advice to reroute you around traffic jams and you start to think about the tremendous savings in fuel economy. We’re proud to be a part of it!
Michigan Governor Rick Snyder stood to proclaim himself a “nerd” in support of the project and Congressman John Dingell drew a large hand of applause when he said that he looked forward to a day when not only vehicles but also people could communicate with each other.
The system was demonstrated to local members of the Media, who were given test drives in vehicles equipped with the technology.
Metro thanks our friends at UMTRI for the opportunity to be a part of this exciting study of developing vehicle-to-vehicle technology! Pictures below!
Things Learned Between Stops: Mercurial Fashions & Accessories
The God of Messengers, Mercury (Hermes to the Greeks) wore a snazzy hat called a PETASOS, adorned with wings, as modeled here on Presto the Metro Penguin.
Mercury also is frequently depicted as wearing winged shoes.
On the evidence, Mercury had an obsessive focus on style that required wings on everything, or he wouldn’t wear it at all.
Mercury carried a (winged) snaky scepter called a CADUCEUS, the traditional staff of Heralds & Messengers.
The impressive image of the caduceus, two snakes intertwined around a rod surmounted with wings, has been appropriated as a logo by various modern Medical Institutions, who’ve confused it with the ROD of ASCLEPIUS, which is a stick with one measly snake tied around it.
Metro Delivery respectfully calls for the restoration of the caduceus to the Couriers, who are its rightful bearers.
Metro Detroit Courier Tip: Name that Road
If you seek regional dialectical authenticity in your discussions of Detroit Roads & Freeways:
1. It’s not “I-75.” It’s the CHRYSLER FREEWAY if you’re motorvatin’ between Downtown Detroit and Pontiac, or the FISHER FREEWAY from Downtown Detroit on Downriver.
2. It’s not “I-94″ that goes East to Port Huron and West to Chicago. It’s the EDSEL FORD FREEWAY.
3. It’s not “I-96 ” that comes out of Downtown and heads for Brighton, Lansing and points West, It’s the JEFFRIES (alternately known as the ROSA PARKS for the 3 miles between Ford Rd. and the Fisher Freeway, more recently).
4. It’s not “I-696″ running parallel to 11 Mile Road between I-275 and the Edsel Ford, It’s the WALTER P. REUTHER FREEWAY.
5. It’s not “M-10.” It’s the JOHN C. LODGE.
6. It’s not “M-8.” It’s the DAVISON.
7. It’s not “M-39.” It’s the SOUTHFIELD FREEWAY.
…and don’t let anyone hear you referring to TELEGRAPH ROAD as US-24, or they’ll know you’re a tourist and try to scare you with tales of “Le Nain Rouge.”
Metro Detroit Courier Tip: North/South Street Formula
Another Public Service Announcement to our Couriers, and offered freely to the Public at Large:
Metro Detroit is laid out in a grid! The North/South Streets have consistent addresses!
Ancient Metro knowledge offers this simple 3-step formula for figuring the Mile road nearest an address on North/South Streets in Detroit, i.e. Schoenherr, Gratiot, Van Dyke, Mound, Livernois, Southfield, Telegraph, etc:
X-5000%2%1000
Example: Let’s say you wanted to go Vern Haney’s Restaurant for their famous “Centerline Cheese Soup.”
Vern Haney’s can be found at 244447 Van Dyke.
1. 24447 -5000=19447
2. 19447 %2 = 97235
3. 97235 %1000 =9.7235
…and indeed, you’ll soon be eating Cheese Soup in Vern Haney’s Family Restaurant, a classic diner in a building that once housed a Howard Johnson’s, between 9 and 10 mile road, a little closer to 10 Mile than 9 Mile (9.7).
…this formula was passed down from primeval Metro Drivers, who rode mastodons and did not have GPS devices leading them around like little electronic mommies.
Metro Reuse Project: the Jr. Workbench,for Hammering, etc.
Reclaimed pallet wood, reclaimed screws, 2 giant reused bolts (found in the street).
Metro Reuse Project: the Decommissioned License-Plate Birdhouse
Pallet wood, sticks, license plates, 8 screws and paint…
